When I wake up, the first thing that I worry about is my future. You see, the love of my life has a hard time waking up in the morning. That leads me to worry, thinking that what if there comes a day that he won’t wake up anymore. So I find solutions in waking him up. With no exaggeration, I call him a hundred times, or I panic, or I sleep again hoping that when I wake up he’s awake. There is so much fear in my heart that it cripples me, that it makes me focus on the negative things in my life. Thinking that what if I will never have a husband to be with in the future, what if, what if, what if.
Up to the point that I just want to end my life cause I can see no future for me anymore. Overwhelming myself emotionally, mentally, and eventually physically. That’s what worrying does, it slowly destroys us inside then out. Worrying for a tomorrow that I can never see, that I can never hold for today.
Until I cried one night. Brawling to God. Asking Him to hold and lead and guide my life. The next day, it was still the same, I was still worrying, but, I chose to trust Him. Cried out again for His guidance. The following day, I woke up with worry again! but.. during breakfast, I decided to open my Bible and read. While reading, God impressed in my heart that verse that I shouldn’t worry about my tomorrow. That I should take one day at a time. So I just kept reading my Bible. To my delight, at the end of my reading, that was the last verse I read! I laughed. I felt so loved. I felt so secured in His arms. There was unexplainable joy that came into my heart. Faith, replaced my fear.
One day at a time. Let tomorrow worry by itself. Focus on today, what God can do today in me and through me.
That’s the joy of having Jesus in our heart. He teaches us how to trust in God. How to receive His joy.
One day at a time girl. One day at a time. 🙂